By Monayzia Taylor*This is written in thoughts of my best friend Bryniesha.
As she waited in the car, she takes out her papers and rehearse her lines over and over again. Her words filling the air, "Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” Her palms turned red after minutes of digging her nails into them, her head starts to wound with nervousness, and knees go weak. She knows that a few blocks from now she will enter the parking lot, the parking lot where her life begins. Her father looks through the mirror and tells her to ease up a little, she’ll do fine. She takes heed of his word, takes a deep breath, lay back, and rehearse her lines over and over again. Her words filling the air, “Me?... Me?... ME?! I’m nothing.” The loud door slap of her father getting out of the car, snapped her from her thoughts. A joyful smile fills her face as she meets up with one of her supportive teacher, Mr. Jeremy Kamps, he greets her with a warm smile and a pat on the back as he leads her inside. He notices lack of energy from her, he reminds her of all the times they’ve stayed after school rehearsing lines over and over again, words filling the air, “Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” The time where she stood in front of the whole fourth block writing class, rehearsing lines over and over again, words filling the air, “Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” Suddenly her confidence is on “BOOST MODE!” Entering the door, down the hall waits the judges, asking her what will she be rehearsing today. A Beneatha line from the play A Raisin in the Sun by Lorraine Hansberry. The judges gives her a head nod, motions her to start. Silents ….. her head is down getting ready to put herself in Beneatha’s shoes, she looks up and there she starts “Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” Silents …. She stops, she messed up, they told her to go to the back room and scream all her nervousness out. She walks on again, she starts and finishes. She walks off stage with her head held high. After that day she never heard back from the judges, her hopes began to decrease. Soon it hit her, because that was her first audition she did pretty good, however it takes rejection to succeed in life. && Yes She? ... She? ... SHE?! ... She's Something = ]
As she waited in the car, she takes out her papers and rehearse her lines over and over again. Her words filling the air, "Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” Her palms turned red after minutes of digging her nails into them, her head starts to wound with nervousness, and knees go weak. She knows that a few blocks from now she will enter the parking lot, the parking lot where her life begins. Her father looks through the mirror and tells her to ease up a little, she’ll do fine. She takes heed of his word, takes a deep breath, lay back, and rehearse her lines over and over again. Her words filling the air, “Me?... Me?... ME?! I’m nothing.” The loud door slap of her father getting out of the car, snapped her from her thoughts. A joyful smile fills her face as she meets up with one of her supportive teacher, Mr. Jeremy Kamps, he greets her with a warm smile and a pat on the back as he leads her inside. He notices lack of energy from her, he reminds her of all the times they’ve stayed after school rehearsing lines over and over again, words filling the air, “Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” The time where she stood in front of the whole fourth block writing class, rehearsing lines over and over again, words filling the air, “Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” Suddenly her confidence is on “BOOST MODE!” Entering the door, down the hall waits the judges, asking her what will she be rehearsing today. A Beneatha line from the play A Raisin in the Sun by Lorraine Hansberry. The judges gives her a head nod, motions her to start. Silents ….. her head is down getting ready to put herself in Beneatha’s shoes, she looks up and there she starts “Me?... Me?... ME?!... I’m nothing.” Silents …. She stops, she messed up, they told her to go to the back room and scream all her nervousness out. She walks on again, she starts and finishes. She walks off stage with her head held high. After that day she never heard back from the judges, her hopes began to decrease. Soon it hit her, because that was her first audition she did pretty good, however it takes rejection to succeed in life. && Yes She? ... She? ... SHE?! ... She's Something = ]
This is a poignant essay and what I love most of all is how it makes the courage of the attempt and the love of the art its own triumph. It’s not about if she got “in” or not, but about this stage in her life. The monologue itself was about Beneatha’s moment when she realized her lifelong dream was to be a doctor and here Bryneisha realizes her own dream. Ms. Taylor shows tremendous insight and understanding in her writing--it’s as though she herself is in the audition. This is the quality that makes her fiction and playwriting so astute and now she has applied it to nonfiction work. The best writing makes us think and feel and Ms. Taylor accomplishes both here.
ReplyDeleteYou use some strong literary devices here. First: the repetition of the phrase "Her words filling the air, 'Me?... Me?... ME?! I'm nothing." This was my favorite part. For me, it emphasized that this was an essay about a girl learning how to believe in herself and her dreams, more than an essay about an audition. A subtle but important difference, revealed subtly through the repetition of this line. You never come out and say she has self-doubt, but putting that line in there over and over makes self-doubt a part of this story. Also, there's tension in the line itself, between the confidence needed to have your "words filling the air," and the insecurity of thinking "I'm nothing."
ReplyDeleteI also like how this essay is just one really big paragraph. I think this further emphasizes that the character had just one really big hurdle to overcome, and that's really what this essay was about. These are just my crazy thoughts though... I'd be curious to hear your reasons for using those literary devices.